hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
