I'm drive I can fine osifer
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
