yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
