I molested 6 butterflies tonight
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
