im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
