I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
