Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
