Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
