woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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