I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
