yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
