it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
my nose is crying tears of wow.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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