People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
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