So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
