Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
