i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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