it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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