do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
