I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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