so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
