I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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