check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
