it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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