"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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