Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
