is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Do you have feelings for this penis?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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