I murdered the dance floor call the cops
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
