I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
