Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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