I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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