you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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