We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
