Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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