Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
