she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
