I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
