She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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