Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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