i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
