did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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