O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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