I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
