i don't like sucking hair
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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