ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
The power of my boobs compel you
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
