matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
