After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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