Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
