seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
