ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
