I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
