And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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